Tuesday, February 24, 2009

ahhhh

i have no time to write, think, breathe, de-stress. i haven't written in a very long time... this needs to change. i need to make time!

last night i started freaking out about my life. i'm graduating in may and have nothing lined up for the summer or fall yet so everything is up in the air. my internship this semester is taking over my life and doing nothing for me but look pretty on my resume. i guess that's a good thing but i've been so negative and stressed and tired lately because of it.  so last night i had a bit of a meltdown. i sent my resume to just about EVERYONE and started searching for new apartments/condos in the area (which led to more freaking out over $$). i even worked out and went on the elliptical for a while to de-stress but my exercise was limited because i went tanning after class  yesterday (need to prep for spring break and look less albino) and wound up very very red. haha so yea, i did what i could without hurting my sunburn.

anyway, i woke up this morning feeling like i had been productive last night to some guys at my apartment putting in a new boiler (no more cold showers!) and had already heard back from some companies. SCORE. okay, i feel a little less worthless and poor now that i know i might actually have some options. and at the very least, i can take long, hot showers now.

Thursday, February 19, 2009

i skipped class...

i am just so tired. i have been getting at least six hour of sleep every night, but i just wake up exhausted. i am breaking down.

i feel like my dreams are telling me something. i really need to start paying attention to them more often. for example, i feel as though my dreams on Saturday and Tuesday night had me prepared for recent events. HA. f that.

i need to write this letter let everything out and then not just talk about it again.

Monday, February 9, 2009

shopping and dudes...

The title says it all. Those are the only two things that cross my mind at this time usually. ugh I wish it was something else. Anyway, instead of talking about dudes (look at posts below), I am going to post some things that I want to purchase for myself:

I NEED these things ASAP:

i just need shoes and jean shorts. i'm going to have to go to the thrift store and just get my own and do it myself.

need to get in the shower.

other than the whole shopping issue, i need to cut myself off from the internet for other reasons OR i need to distract myself with something else. i hate myself sometimes.
MySpace Music Presents Blog Check: Brandon Boyd of Incubus


ah. where have you been hiding.
i <3 incubus. not too keen on their two newest records but they were my ultimate in high school.
marry me brandon boyd.
love that new haircut.

Sunday, February 8, 2009

swoon...


he makes me swoon. why don't dudes i know look like him...

Thursday, February 5, 2009

My life (my life) would suck (would suck) without you...

i love the new kelly clarkson song. it is my favorite song at this moment. i cannot stop listening to it. i must listen to it at least once or maybe ten times a day. it is like my other favorite kelly clarkson song, since you been gone. kelly clarkson makes me so happy.

5 more weeks until dominican republic.
i've been doing the gym and eating well thing. gotta keep up with it and hopefully i'll look like marissa miller one day.

on a different note, over it. i look back and i was pathetic and it is really embarassing. eeeeek!

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

went to a party last saturday night...

i need a new crush or dude in my life.
that is all.
goodnight.
why am i not sleeping?